Just for fun--put on your dancing shoes!

Today's New York Times had a story on contradancing and country dancing in the Big Apple.

When I lived in New York City--from 1979 to 1992--this was my subculture. I loved dancing at the church at 13th and Seventh on Tuesday and Saturday nights. It makes me happy to know the dances are still going on. The Times story quoted someone I used to know in the dance scene in New York, Olivia Janovitz. (Hi, Olivia!)

In those days I belonged to a women's sword dance troupe, too. We did things like this.



I miss it! And them.

Self-esteem

Yet another star (in this case, Valerie Bertinelli) is writing a memoir about, among other things, her "lifelong battle with weight and self-esteem."

She's talking about overweight, in this case, and it all sounds so damn familiar: Low self-esteem makes people get fat. It's the same rhetoric that floats around anorexia, which is so often said to be linked to issues of self-esteem. Apparently it works both ways, or both weighs.

Inquiring minds know the truth: Starvation causes all kinds of psychological phenomenona, including depression, anxiety, and, yes, low self-esteem. And being fat in America is an invitation to feelings of worthlessness, inadequacy, and low self-esteem. All you have to do is walk down the street and it flies right at you. Or go to your mother's funeral. Or try to adopt a child.

For once I wish people would get it right. I wish they'd lay the blame squarely where it belongs. In the case of anorexia, that's on biology. And in the case of fat--that's called prejudice.

At risk for what?

This just in: Experts are now urging women to watch their weight before pregnancy and get back to their pre-pregnancy weight quickly after giving birth. Their new recommendations include:

* Body mass index should be measured as part of vital signs at routine annual check-ups and all women of child bearing age should be counseled to achieve and maintain optimal BMI.
* Preconception counseling programs should include education regarding the poor maternal and perinatal outcomes among the obese and overweight.
* Women with high BMI planning a pregnancy should be counseled to participate in intensive nutrition programs aimed to achieve optimum BMI prior to conception.
* Encouraging breastfeeding can partially help to decrease childhood obesity and also help mother to return quickly to pre-pregnancy weight.

Why the panic? Because, say these researchers, "maternal obesity" leads to all kinds of terrible things for babies, including higher C-section rates, "less chance" of being breastfed, obesity later in life, and--I kid you not--"high birth weight."

And here I thought low birth weight was the big risk when it comes to babies and weight. After all, low birth weight can contribute to respiratory problems, cardiovascular problems, infections, neurological problems, SIDS, cerebral palsy, and other medical issues.

But never mind all that. As we should all know by now, it's much worse to be fat than any of those.

I guess they never heard of genetics, and have never read the dismal statistics on weight loss, or followed the studies that show that losing weight if you're fat actually increases your health risks on many levels.

As Sandy Szwarc pointed out in a recent post, there are people who think you can be too fat to love a child. I guess you can be too fat to have a child too.

Tornadoes on NPR

Want to hear a funny story? This radio commentary—on surviving my first tornado—ran on All Things Considered today. Let me know what you think.

Take the love-your-body pledge

The previous post, and some of the comments on it, got me thinking hard about how to begin to change the culture around fat and how we perceive it.

I asked myself: What's the one thing I wish I could change around this issue? The answer: I wish I could change the way girls and women talk to themselves and others about their bodies.

I've posted about this before. And I've written about it in this article. Now it's time to do something about it.

So I have this crazy idea: What if we could disseminate a kind of pledge that young girls and women would sign, promising not to trash-talk about their bodies? Something like this:

I, __________________, pledge to speak kindly about my body.

I promise not to talk about how fat my thighs or stomach or butt are, or about how I really have to lose 5 or 15 or 50 pounds. I promise not to call myself a fat pig, gross, or any other self-loathing, trash-talking phrase.

I vow to be kind to myself and my body. I will learn to be grateful for its strength and attractiveness, and be compassionate toward its failings.

I will remind myself that bodies come in all shapes and sizes, and that no matter what shape and size my body is, it’s worthy of kindness, compassion, and love.


Then what if we got some of their favorite role models to sign, and stand up and say why it's important? Folks like, I don't know, Sheryl Crow and Jennifer Hudson and Mia Hamm? Would you sign it?

See, I think sometimes if you change the story you tell yourself about something, your feelings follow along. So maybe if we change the words we use to talk about our bodies, our feelings about them will follow along too.

And then maybe kids like the 12-year-old in my previous post won't feel so anxious and conflicted about what they eat and how they look. And maybe some of the kids who are genetically predisposed to eating disorders won't develop them.

Maybe it's naive. Or maybe it's a good idea. What do you think?

Overheard at the lunch table

Recently I had occasion to take my kids on an all-day excursion, to which they were allowed to each invite a friend. As we cruised the lunch joint we'd chosen, the 12-year-old friend seemed, well, anxious about what to choose. She wanted nachos, she said, but that wasn't healthy. (Sound familiar, anyone?) Her parents, she explained, have a rule about eating fruits and vegetables at every meal. She finally settled on nachos and a container of cut-up fruit. "My father says I don't eat enough for a girl my age," she commented. Gee, I wonder why; could she be learning from them to be afraid of food? If she has the genetic loading for an eating disorder, she's in big trouble.

As we ate, the conversation turned to a new movie, Ratatouille. This girl had seen it. "I really liked it," she reported, "except for all those rats who were so fat!" Then she went on: "It's so disgusting! They had all these bulges of so much fat!"

I was fairly stunned, but only because she was articulating what I know so many people think. I didn't know what to say, honestly, and what came to mind wasn't great: "In our family we don't feel fat is bad. People come in all shapes and sizes."

"But all they have to do is eat less and eat healthy and they wouldn't be fat!" she cried. Out of the mouths of babes, huh? "That's not actually true," I said, and then changed the subject, feeling like a coward. But I really didn't feel like taking it on, especially since I could see she was just parroting what she'd heard at home.

Later in the day, everyone else got ice cream, and so, I was happy to see, did she. The fruit went home unopened. For what it's worth.

Seeking adults with anorexia for interview

I'm working on a magazine feature for HEALTH magazine about adults with anorexia and am looking for women in their 30s and 40s who would be interested in being interviewed. The original scope of this project was on people who developed anorexia as adults, but it's now changed to women who are still suffering from anorexia as adults, no matter when they developed it.

If you fit the criteria and you've already talked to me, please get in touch again--I lost my records in a computer crash.

If you're willing to talk by phone, please email me off list. I promise it's a sensitively written article, the purpose of which is to help educate mainstream readers about anorexia. God knows they need it!

Anorexia on NPR

A friend called over the weekend to say that she'd been listening to this interview with the author of Peony in Love when she heard interviewer Liane Hansen make a comment about anorexia that made her blood boil. The author was describing lovesick young girls in 17th-century China. Hansen's comment, which comes about 4.15 minutes into the interview:

"It is interesting, the lovesick young ladies that are affected by the opera, what happens to them in their lovesickness is they starve themselves. And that's so much like anorexia, where you have young women today, and young men, starving themselves because that is the only way that they have some control over their own body."

Dear Liane Hansen, you may be an expert on so many things, as your NPR bio indicates, but anorexia is not one of them. Your throwaway comment about anorexia was made out of ignorance rather than malice, I'm sure. But ignorant it was.

Most researchers today believe that anorexia is a biologically based brain disorder. It's not "about" control. It's not "about" bad parenting, any more than autism or schizophrenia are. In fact, it's not "about" anything at all except having the bad luck to be genetically predisposed and to live in a culture full of triggers.

You have a lot of influence, Liane Hansen. I hope you will take this opportunity to educate yourself about anorexia. This website and this website would be great places to start. Then give me a call--I'd love to talk.

PETA's fat-hating frenzy

The folks over at PETA have a gripe with filmmaker Michael Moore: they want him to make a documentary about animal rights.

That's cool. But the way they go about airing their gripe--very uncool.

The president of PETA, Ingrid Newkirk, wrote an open letter to Moore last week, which was publicized on PETA's blog. In it, Newkirk urges Moore to go vegetarian:

"Although we think that your film could actually help reform America’s sorely inadequate health care system, there’s an elephant in the room, and it is you. With all due respect, no one can help but notice that a weighty health issue is affecting you personally. We’d like to help you fix that. Going vegetarian is an easy and life-saving step that people of all economic backgrounds can take in order to become less reliant on the government’s shoddy healthcare system, and it’s something that you and all Americans can benefit from personally.”

PETA's blog goes on to say, "The idea is that if people didn't make themselves unhealthy in the first place by eating meat products that are known to cause heart disease, high blood pressure, and strokes, the situation would easier for everyone. As Ingrid puts it, 'Yes, America’s health care system needs to be fixed, but personal responsibility is a big part of why people look and feel as ill as they do.'"

Take that, Michael Moore! It's YOUR fault if you get sick—and so is the whole crappy health care system in America!

Hoo-wee! It's great to feel powerful, isn't it?

Note to Ingrid Newkirk: Go have a doughnut or something.

One more reason why I'm a fan of family-based treatment

There are very few follow-up studies (or heck, any studies at all) of anorexia treatment, so I was glad to see this one, done in Norway a couple of years ago. I wasn't so glad of its outcomes.

The study was a one-year followup of adult anorexics who'd been treated on an inpatient unit. Of the 24 patients they followed up with, 10 (42%) had improved one year later, while 14 (58%) had "poor outcomes."

I'm grateful that they did the study, frankly, because most of the numbers on inpatient anorexia treatment come straight from the clinics and units, which often stand to make a tidy sum on treatment. Their followups are usually done at discharge, so they don't take into account what almost always happens after that: relapse and rehospitalization.

So bravo to the researchers in Vikersund. And chalk up another reason why family-based (Maudsley) treatment is an excellent option for anorexia.

"Who *doesn't* want to lose 20 pounds?"

That's what ex-supermodel Rachel Hunter said in New York magazine about her new gig as spokeswoman for Slim-Fast. She was admitting that she'd never tried it.

This kind of fat trash talk is my least favorite. It's the equivalent of the air kiss, the baring of the throat by the subordinate animal. It's a social custom denoting (supposedly) good taste and submissive femininity. The words themselves aren't the point; it's the intention behind them. And the intension is to erase the self, to make yourself as small and thin and weak as possible.

20 pounds = the weight of 7 brains
20 pounds = the weight of my older daughter at age 11 months
20 pounds = the number of pounds I lost on my first diet, age 15
20 pounds = the number of pounds I lost on my last diet, age 29
20 pounds = the amount of weight lost by my mother in law in the month before she died of cancer

But who doesn't want to lose 20 pounds?

**Thanks to Maggie! for sending this item my way

Another book the world doesn't need--gulp!

Thanks to Kate Harding for posting about the latest entry in the fat hatred sweepstakes--a joint project from two of my former favorite children's book authors. The book is The Gulps, and it features a lazy, gluttonous family who are constantly eating junk food and watching TV. Just like all the fat people I know in real life!

The Gulps was written by Rosemary Wells and illustrated by Marc Brown (of Arthur fame). May it die a speedy, painful death and be remaindered as quickly as possible.

This is what dieting can lead to

This excerpt from a brave, honest livejournal entry, addressed to the "pro-ana" contingent, made me cry. Of course not everyone who diets will become anorexic. But everyone who becomes anorexic goes through this. It's heartbreaking. It's lifebreaking.


"I have anorexia.

Not 'pro-anorexia,'
Not a strict weight loss obsession.

The last 6 months of my life have been hell.

I have watched everything I love slowly deteriorate around me, my own little world be turned completely on its head. I have damaged myself beyond repair and hurt those i love time and time and time again.
And I cannot control it.
Because it is a disease.
It is a condition.

And right now, it's very very bad for me.

I cannot express my frustration with those people who exploit the anorexic condition by using it to starve themselves as a weightloss strategy.
I want to eat.
I want my life back.
Anorexia stops me.
I'm fighting it, but it's hard. the hardest thing I've ever done.
How dare you all, sit there and wish for this.
Get out now while you can.
Please. I wish I could."

More research on anorexia . . . I think

I'm a big supporter of more research about anorexia. If you've read my blog or articles you know I think one of the reasons we don't have better treatments is lack of good research. So I'm always excited to see a new study come out.

I have to admit, though, that the title of this one--"What is worse for your sex life: Starving, being depressed, or a new baby?"--reminded me of the kinds of questions you ask your friends when you're in middle school, like "Which would you rather do, burn to death or freeze to death?"

Still, I guess it's a good thing to have the redoubtable Cynthia Bulik involved in a new study, whatever the topic. After all, she's at the forefront of the research on the genetics and biology of anorexia.

Oh, and if you're wondering, the answer to the question the study poses is that it's better to have a new baby.

Shame on you, Dear Abby

I'll cop to reading Dear Abby, despite the often off-the-mark advice she doles out. But today's column went beyond off-the-mark and into just-plain-dangerous-and-wrong territory.

Here's the letter in question: "I'm an attractive, single, successful, 27-year-old woman who has struggled with anorexia ever since I was 12. I have learned to live with it and feel no need to advertise it to the world. However, I find that many strangers, including a large number of people I associate with at work, feel a compulsion to comment on my weight (105 pounds and 5 foot 9), the size of the clothes I wear, or what I eat. It's as uncomfortable a subject for me as I imagine it is for people who are overweight, and I have no 'pat' answer for them." --Annoyed at 105

Here's Abby's response:
Dear Annoyed: Clearly, your weight issues are more obvious to those around you than you chose to believe. However, you are under no obligation to answer these intrusive questions if it makes you uncomfortable. When confronted, reply, "That's a very personal question (or subject) and I'd prefer not to discuss it." Then change the subject.


Argh! Please write to her and set her straight about anorexia: It's not a "lifestyle choice" but a lethal mental illness. Ask her why she would sanction this writer's settling for a life distorted by anorexia. Invite her to list resources that might be helpful to "Annoyed" and her family, including maudsleyparents.org, NEDA, eatingwithyouranorexic.com, and others.

This is a teachable moment on a national scale. Go for it!

Couldn't resist this one, either

Check out this satire on all the "war on obesity" news of late. Hee hee.

Because I can't resist . . .

You won't be able to, either. It's a musical love letter from a young Brit to the "big girls," and it really rocks!

"Fitnessgrams" for kids

My 11-year-old daughter's report card came in the mail today. Along with the usual list of academic subjects and grades came another piece of paper with a big orange bar at the top. In blue blue letters it read FITNESSGRAM. Below was a graph of how my daughter had performed on a series of fitness tests, including a one-mile run, abdominal curl-ups, trunk lifts, push-ups, and flexibility. Then there was another little box labeled "Body Mass Index," showing her past and current BMIs plotted against a bar graph. Her scores were in the green "healthy fitness zone." To the right was a large red area--danger! fatsos coming!--labeled "Needs improvement." That's where your bar graph ends up if your BMI is "too high." To the left was a tiny red box labeled "very low," which is, I suppose, where your bar graph ends up if you're anorexic.

I guess this is supposed to be a cute, non-threatening way of communicating with parents, a kind of casual, unofficial, "Say, did you know your kid's in great shape?" or "Hey, by the way, your kid's kinda fat!"

This is insulting on any number of levels, of course, but let's just pick one: the suggestion that it's better to be too skinny than too fat, which as we know is not supported by any actual science.** Why isn't the "too skinny" area labeled something like "needs medical attention now!"? Why isn't the "too fat" area labeled "plenty of nutritional reserves!"?

My daughter was more upset about the fake activity pyramid on the back of the fitnessgram, modeled after that most famous of irrelevancies, the USDA food pyramid. At the bottom, the widest section was labeled "lifestyle activity," and it listed walking, biking, skateboarding, housework, yardwork, dancing, and playing active games. The next level held two smaller squares labeled aerobic activity and aerobic sports. One level up, another two squares were labeled muscular activity and flexibility activity. The smallest section, the point of the pyramid, was labeled "rest," and it included schoolwork, homework, reading, computer games, TV, videos, eating, resting, and sleeping.

Clearly these are the things you're supposed to do as little of as possible. My daughter was outraged. "I wonder what the teachers would think about this!" she cried. "You're not supposed to read?"

Imagine boot camp. Then imagine a sergeant from boot camp running the schools. "You there, cadet, stop wasting time with your nose in a book and give me 50 on the floor!" Never mind the fact that kids are supposed to be developing their intellectual capabilities at this (and every) age; in the new Fitness World, only activities that burn calories are sanctioned. Even by schools.

I feel like we're living in a Kurt Vonnegut story. And it's only gonna get worse.


** Calorie reduction (CR) nutcases notwithstanding.

Why dieting is the ultimate health risk

Big kudos to Sandy Szwarc, whose most recent post looks at how the American Heart Association's "heart-healthy" diet recommendations don't actually add up to better health or longer lives for women.

Eating healthy, in other words, doesn't protect you from heart disease. (We're talking about women who aren't sick; the statistics are different for those who already have heart disease.) And eating "not-healthy" doesn't put you at higher risk--at least, no studies have been able to show a cause and effect relationship.

In fact, all "eating healthy" (read: dieting) does, as we know, is make you fatter by messing up your metabolism with the deprivation-and-binge cycle. So dieting itself is a risk factor for obesity.

Obesity, it turns out, is a risk factor for diabetes, but not much else. Fat people actually do better after heart attacks than thin people. Older people who are fat live longer than their skinny peers.

Another thing dieting does is trigger eating disorders in those who are susceptible. Once more, dieting itself is a risk factor for anorexia, a serious illness that kills up to 20% of those who suffer from it.

Oh yeah, it does one more thing: Make money for the multi-billion-dollar weight loss industry, for the bariatric surgeons, and for the obesity researchers. Cui bono, baby?

So forget the war on obesity, which is as ill-conceived and well-funded as the war in Iraq. I think we need a war on dieting.

**This post is dedicated to the memory of my dear friend Marilyn "Mimi" Orner, who founded the Anti-Anorexia/Bulimia/Dieting Project. She was an advocate of size acceptance, a survivor of anorexia, and a powerful inspiration to a generation of young women. She died of ovarian cancer in 2000 but has not been forgotten. You still rock, Mimi!

How can you tell if your child is developing an eating disorder?

Go here to listen to my radio essay on the subject, which aired today on "To the Best of Our Knowledge." The essay aired as part of the show dated 6/17/07.